Fast, Furious Fish and Chips

Welcome readers,

In this blog will be all manner of automotive joy that anyone with a passion for engines and wheels will relate to and appreciate.

For today’s ramble I would like to begin talking about a day in the recent past, at Auto VIP, where thanks to a member of staff winning an internal competition for outstanding customer service, we had a day to remember!

The prize for our lucky winner was to select a car he desired the most from our stock and I would do the same. We would then drive our selections over to Whitby with the person arriving second having to pay for the Fish & Chips. All within the confines of the speed limits of course….. Once the winner had enjoyed his belly full of free grub we would swap cars and head home. Sounds straight forward enough but given the delectable machines that spend their nights at Auto VIP this is quite a mouth-watering prospect. So to the cars…….

Our winner first. For the purposes of this article we will call him Ken, I will explain why I choose this name later. Ken chose superbly! A bright yellow Porsche 996 GT3. Stunning, raw and like this car doesn’t turn heads to start with painted yellow it’s not shy. Ken grins from ear to ear as he straps in and fires her up. That familiar engine tone fills the room and he tentatively inches the car outside to sit and warm up. Already you can see the slight judder to his hands from the adrenaline and excitement. I totally understand this as even for the most seasoned driver if you don’t get those butterflies when you start up a car of this ilk then there is something wrong with you and maybe gardening is more your thing.

On to my choice…….

I chose the closest thing to The Batmobile I have ever seen. A matt black Noble M12 GTO 3R (the one with the LSD). This car is larger than life! For some a little over the top but I love its brash spoilers and typically English “that will do” type charm. The doors rub once opened and the whole thing very like a big toy until you actually get in. That’s when the shift from smirking at it changes into gritted teeth. You sit so low you feel like you belong on the Le Mans 24 Hour circuit and the seats wrap around proving a secure sensation much like you get from that clunk as the metal locks in place on a rollercoaster. Internal harnesses add to the race car feel, which is not pretend I would add! Ferociously quick delivering 352 BHP through the rear wheels. When you take into account the car only weighs in at 1,050 KG you can see why this thing is electric to drive. The trump card here though above the looks and the power is the handling. This car will grip way beyond the farthest reaches of your bravery! Its front end feels like it is being pressed down into the road by some unseen hand from the sky! This is what makes this the Noble for me… the confidence this traction gives you along with the ballistic speed makes for a recipe of stomach muscle testing acceleration which brings with it the most spectacular array of noises from behind your ears. The turbo’s sound like an asthmatic Darth Vader is sat behind you and when you go for another gear the waste gate’s chirp like oversized pigeons! Don’t worry how good the brakes are, you don’t need them, just steer when the corner comes, the car won’t bat an eye lid. Amazing!

For those of you who know the roads around the Whitby area playing scenes from your own enjoyment of them in your mind’s eye will no doubt be bringing smiles to faces. I suspect especially to those readers who enjoy two wheels as some of the heroic / crazy things I have seen from bikers on those roads will stay with me for a long time.

Anyway off we go……..

Initially with a healthy dose of cold tyre related paranoia (especially for Ken) we tickle our way out and onto the main road. I must stress here readers we are not racing! This is a drive to enjoy and not to regret as soon as it ends for fear of a court summons landing on the mat. As we get used to our comrades and the cars get warm our feet settle on the pedals instead of bouncing like a drummer and breathing slows. The Porsche just looks so planted. The engineering it has to handle like it does alongside a mid-engined car like the Noble is mind blowing. It does it though, and it does it with what looks like complete ease! A straight and it rasps off into the distance followed by a substantial adrenaline dump for our Ken I am sure. The miles tick by with the stunning scenery out of the window and as we peel back the layers of our vehicles you start to understand why the term ~Petrol Head” exists.

For all you “Petrol Heads” out there I hope you catch up with the next instalment of this blog to find out why “Ken” is called “Ken”.


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